I get a little twitchy when I read another post warning against the perils of topping from the bottom. You’d think there was an epidemic going on!
Okay, this is not a popular opinion, but I don’t think topping from the bottom exists. At least, not the way it’s usually described.
Let’s say there’s a male Dom, female sub. The sub says, oh, I’d like an orgasm now, and he gives her one. By definition, topping from the bottom just happened… right? No! A sub is allowed to ask for things ANYTIME SHE WANTS. It’s still up to the Dom to decide whether he wants to do it or not. He could have denied her, but he didn’t want to. She’s not *tricking* him.
By the way, I feel like the very concept is disrespectful. Can we give Doms a little credit? They are smart. They understand when a sub is trying to get his/her way, and can make a conscious choice to give it or not.
Neither choice makes the Dom weak.
Nicely said.
An epidemic! LOL. I just read another ‘topping from the bottom’ post (and the comments) that made me twitchy too. I just had to take a deep breath and walk away…
@Karla Thanks!
@Diana Hehe, yes, I do a lot of that on the internet! Deep breath and walk away. Still love it though
I’m learning a lot lately about the lifestyle. Thank you for this post.
Thanks for dropping by, Savannah
Good point! As you say, it’s the Dom’s choice whether to say yes or no. Granting someone a pleasure is no less an exercise in power than denying them one. By the sub asking, it gives the Dom another opportunity to exercise his power.